Ok, I must get serious about this ship model I’ve been commissioned to carve.
It will have a dragon’s head at the bow, a sail, and it must be combustible.
But how big should the ship be? I’ll have to phone a funeral home, to get a weight estimate.

But first I better review the instructions.

“Mr. Stokes, we commission you to build a replica model of a Viking ship.
Our dear recently departed father, Yorgen Johansen, demanded a traditional Viking funeral.
British Columbia regulations are quite strict about the disposal of bodies, so we are sending you Yorgen’s ashes instead.

At the funeral we will launch the ship, carrying Yorgen’s ashes, on to Okanagan Lake.
Just before launch, we will set the ship afire.
It must burn slowly as it drifts along, and then sink.
If you have any questions, please contact us.”

This is a true story, only the names and places are fictional.